When your young, you feel at times invincible depending on how you grew up, other times life is an ongoing struggle. After high school your clueless since no options were introduced to you of what to do with your life and because of this when formal education is missing and no one is available to share what is going on in the world. However, what happens to you as a young female? Pregnancy and getting married for all the wrong reasons far to young.
When this takes place, whether its your high school sweetheart or some old guy who has a thing for young girls, it’s wrong!!!! Anytime you get married for the wrong reasons, it’s wrong. This is an act only a mature person should make and old guy with a little security is not a solution as well. Your only means to him is filling up his EGO!!! I have the right to say this speaking from personal experience. Years down the line the marriage might fail which is common, your wondering why the fuck did I make this mistake? But your now stuck working your ass off and raising kids alone.
The years fly by with years of stress, kids are now of age going through their own personal turmoil and the only thing you have to look forward to is being alone with a moment of sanity as you cherish peace of mind in the mornings before coffee. Of course, its not like that, since those kids you raised are going through their mid-life change (which is very hard), your going through menopause and the entire family is at the most difficult time of struggle. Now your at a point in your life, your going to jump ship because of the pressure, feeling powerless and tired, so tired you have no strength left.
Let me share with you my view of Menopause and why no on talks about it; and how it will feel going through the motions of menopause? I’m going to start backwards and work my way back to my teens, this is an outline, but for the many women, younger and older that will read this post, everyone will have personal variables.
No one talks about Menopause and how it affects a woman’s life, mentally, emotionally and physically. What women can do to take back their power and energy. The moment I hit 50 I was already feeling extremely tired physically and mentally (naps are okay). You will lose significant amounts of iron in your body (get to a doctor right away and get iron pills). If you find yourself sitting down every 5 minutes, this is why? If a woman has had children your body will be drained because of the loss of iron during menopause. Orange Juice daily is natural, and a good supplement for loss of iron, (one glass). I was so drained and weak I didn’t have the strength to take out the trash and during this time I was caring for my man until he died.
THINGS TO DO TO TAKE BACK YOUR POWER AND ENERGY
- Take a Nap Daily (twice a day if needed, its a power nap).
- Change your Diet, to eat light in the morning and a nice healthy meal in the mid evening.
- Me Time is Very Important (reading a book), (just sitting with quiet time), (relax your mind), long walks.
- Communicate to the family (which is very hard to describe your feelings) You are going through a lot, you don’t want to hearing arguing and your nervous are fried!!!! Hopefully this will be clear for them to be considerate, if not, CUT ALL TIES!
- You need to be selfish, this relates to the above statement, because as your kids are going through their Mid-life Crisis, (their going mentally bonkers) which is about identity, your going through Menopause and the strain of problems is ugly and you feel as if your in a black hole with no power.
- Menopause is the hardest time for a woman because family will be at its worst, with problems manifesting, behaviors out of character, this is why its critical to be SELFISH you will need that time to yourself, to gain your power back?
- Menopause can last a good ten years, the more selflove you provide yourself with, the more confidence you will gain.
- Women have taken on, far to much in our lives, especially having kids to young, this can facture the “IDENTITY” process, so don’t feel guilty about being selfish and doing for you. YOU MATTER TOO!
- If you have a husband, you need to tell him how you feel, this can be a rough time in a marriage as well.
- If he is not compassionate or can’t comprehend, he might be going through his own changes not recognizing it. Sometimes its really hard for men to. As they are getting older and changing, they struggle to express their feelings and relate to the marriage. They might seem distant, as they are unsure of how to please you or they are struggling with their emotions.
- Communicate it’s vital and can be comforting to each other, to give that support you both need. Be patient and hang in there.
- Since society has become more dysfunctional than ever a road trip can be the medicine you need.
- Create positive change in your life and write down “POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS” I am FABULOUS!!!! I am CONFIDENT!!
- Do a 30 minute work out, or yard work is a great work out and equivalent to the gym.
- Go shopping and buy yourself new clothes as you begin to get back into shape, because that extra belly is unexpected.
- How to get rid of the extra belly during menopause. Or you just choose what feels good for you!
- Go to your doctor and get a full check up with a blood panel, kidney and all body organs checked out. Let the Doc know what your going through as you will need all the support you can get.
Okay ladies I hope this is a good start, I will update as I go along on my journey, just remember, you matter too and there is nothing wrong with being selfish and giving self love. It’s vital.
Let me share this, I truly believe being a Capricorn has much to do with my personality traits, which are linked to my behavior with all negative and positive experiences in life has much to do with every aspect of who I am. I never realized how the chakras that are unbalanced can affect us as humans. It has taken me all my life until now, to mature and realize so much about myself. Changing my behavior, being less angry, feeling good, laughing at myself. Lessening the stress everyday, it’s a working process. Senses of the Soul Oracle I found to be very helpful during this time in my life.
As a teenager I never knew these things existed, how are bodies are made mostly of water, how mid-life change is about Identity, how confronting your shadow is vital to the darker aspects of knowing your true self. Having babies to dam young strips you from your dreams, opportunities, life experiences, no young female should have children. Frankly I believe the road less traveled is best. The sign you born under is good to study, connecting with your higher self, understanding your darker aspects (which everyone as them) will bring you a more fulfilled knowledge of your inner being.
As a teen I was so clueless and grew up with so much negative shit, in the house, I never understood why? Now I do, but that will be for another post. All I know is if I had someone to tell me the things I should have known about having kids to young, I would have never had kids!!! Frankly I never wanted them at all, but my mom doesn’t believe in abortion and I never realized the resentment I had. Now I do, she should have helped me to make a choice, not made the choice for me. Gloria was a good mother don’t get me wrong, we just have different views and my dreams were important to me, knowing who I am and wanting more. Everything changed and my life was no longer mine and no one can teach you how to be a parent, but everyone is good at telling you how to raise your kids with contradictions and criticism, as f they know anymore than you do?
I’m sure I did the same thing to my own daughter, well actually it was the opposite, I encouraged the abortion option, which she has done, twice. She has no kids, but I know it was for the best. Does she resentment me because of it? I’ll have to ask her? I just know I didn’t want any of my kids going through the same problems, and pain I went through, but they are, my sons each have kids and are separated, this is another reason not to have kids. Children need both parents to be stable in all areas. It’s not worth having kids when family can’t pull together for the common good and everyone has struggles trying to grow up.
The reason I say all of this is because in hopes a young girl reads it, she’ll pay attention and will take care of herself not to have kids, the road less traveled is best, because you have no idea how fucken hard it will be and its one in a million your marriage or relationship with the father will be a life time episode of “Ozzie and Harriet”.
An example I know of, a young woman 32 pregnant and on the street with no one, not even the other party because he lives with mom and dad. Refusing to take responsibility, even his mother is a bitch about the situation. Trust me when I say, your life will be fucken hard and disappointing when the pressure hits, its no joke! Now that I am older I still have no financial security and being older and getting married for that very reason doesn’t sit with me either. I would like to marry for money, but if I don’t at least like the person I am with, it won’t be good, resentment is always lingering.
Why do you think immature old men want young girls? Because they can’t handle women my age with my confidence and bigger balls than them! Yes women rule during this time in our lives, and men fucking know it. So ask yourself, do you want to a good life? Or ongoing struggles with kids? Because this world is so fucked up right now, with peoples lives torn apart. You decide. Educate yourself and work hard, know who you are because you can’t depend on anyone other than yourself!!!